Two days ago, my homie Amari posted the following as his status on Facebook:
I know you females get all sensitive on the subject of abortion; question(s) though:
1. Under what circumstances is it “understandable”?
2. Assuming most of you would probably say “NONE”, what if you were raped?
After reading it I started laughing in my mind because I knew he would only be responded to by a bunch of self-righteous chicks that are so steadfast in their own beliefs that would be unable to offer an open-minded and unbiased contribution to the pending discussion. I also knew that once those opinionated chicks started to spew words of rebuke, the chicks who were not really against it would become somewhat muted for fear of being judges. In the back of my mind, I had the feeling that some chick was going to try and swing it towards being a conversation bashing males so I was just waiting for that to happen too. Oh come on, you know those chicks don’t take a break. You could have been talking about Christmas lights and they’ll find some way to try and bring dudes down.
Reviewing my predictions, I was somewhat right. Here were a few of the first responses:
“A woman should make that decision herself. Regardless of the issue, rape, finances or she’s just not ready. In the end, only she can answer to the Almighty. #I’m don’t judge” -B!t(h, who said anything about the decision itself and her not being able to make it? Stick to the damn topic!
“Its the females who abuse it I frown upon ‘oh imma freak this dude raw & if I get pregnant, Imma jus abort it’ That shit irks me. If it was a mistake i.e condom burst, rape, happened even on the pill etc then they can do wat they gotta do” -point taken
“….I’m of the opinion its always the woman’s choice….whoever she has to answer to in the end is her issue” –OMFG!!! Another one of these b!t(he$… You’d think they’d have a protest to go to against the use of Vagisil since a man owns it.
“I only feel it should be acceptable be for a rape victim…or DISCUSTING incest people. No other way, if you do the ‘crime(unprotected sex)’ you should do the ‘time(raising a baby till they are an adult)’ … some women take this option for…granted and throw away a baby each time she makes a “mistake” Women, if you dont want to get pregnant PROTECT YOUR DAMN SELVES… i know us as women have so many options to prevent pregnancy..USE THEM…i dont wanna hear an excuse later when u wanna throw away your child….abortion discusts me…” –people who can’t spell “disgust” shouldn’t have an opinion. I’ll address her thoughts later.
“u cold no fuck there is no reason to abort a child Mari ….. Rape or not ……. give it up for adoption if u cant take care of it ……. if i get rape and got pregnant imma keep it end of story ……” –HA HA HA!!! This one was clearly talking with her ovaries. I like Amari’s response to her though: “Nice 4 u and the STRONG nigga who wud stay with u and help raise it.”
Most chicks are openly against abortions and the others are probably just unsure and are therefore silent about it. I think it’s that “motherly” instinct in a woman that makes her jump to the defense of unborn fetuses. While I can’t really argue with that or their inability to not get caught up in their emotions, I think as with most things it’s easy to have a negative opinion when you’ve never “been there”, and this is what a lot of them are doing. Be that as it may, I’ll drop two pennies on the matter.
*you should probably check the Stop having babies post out before continuing*
Leave the men out of it
For some reason when the topic of abortions is brought up men are the first thing that comes to mind. This was very evident in all the chicks in the above mentioned FB status who jumped to saying “it’s the woman’s choice”; completely disregarding the topic at hand. It’s as if men were the inventors and are the only instigators of abortions. OK, maybe they probably were but I’m not planning on going down that road but just keeping it about the act itself.
An issue of morality
I find it funny how “Christian” a lot of people become when it comes to the issue of abortion. I bet there are some prolife individuals reading this right now ready to debate the issue using the Bible as substantial evidence and reasoning for not committing the act because it is a “sin”. However, I do recall the Bible stating that all sin is sin regardless of the weight society places on it. Having hatred in your heart for your brethren ranks right up there with “murder” in the eyes of the Lord. So if you die living your life on the path ordained by God but was wishing someone would put Justin Bieber in a coma, then you’re still going to Hell since “the wages of sin is death” Romans 6:23.
The point? Well I know 99.99% of the blog’s readers have had sex before marriage and still participate in such acts or have “lusted for the wife/husband of their neighbor” (not to mention a whole host of other sins) so them picking to jump down the throat of someone who considers abortion an option because it is a “sin” is blatantly hypocritical. IF you both end up in Hell, there’s not going to be a section that’s cooler for the persons who told a little white lie while the adulterers have to swan dive into a volcano. “The eternal fires prepared for the Devil and his angels” does not know how to discriminate.
Is abortion a sin?
The main issue prolife activists and religious folk have with abortion is that it is a sin because it is the willful killing of an unborn child. Killing may be defined as taking the life of a living being. The thing is though, when a fetus is aborted you aren’t technically “killing it”. It was never really living, breathing, thinking etc. on its own to begin with. What you are doing however is taking its chance at life. From a biblical “ten commandments” standpoint that’s OK because it’s not really a sin. I mean, since “life begins at birth” you can’t exactly take it away because it was never there in the first place right?
I’d advise you to stop reading and skip to the next section if I’m already stepping on your toes because I’m about to say some messed up stuff.
OK, I’ll dig a little deeper and try to mollify the “chance at life” advocates a bit. Cold as it may sound, until a mother gives birth to a child all it is is a “dependent parasite” leeching off of her resources. I classify it as a dependent parasite because the moment you take it away from the host it “dies” (is unable to survive on its own). If you’re up on your prenatal development game, you’ll know that the first 12 weeks are called the embryonic period and it’s pretty much a sack of cells. There is a 0% chance at life outside of the mother at this point and about 60% of all abortions happen within this period. To me, this is the best time to have an abortion because it just like taking a “day after” pill… only a “couple” days after.
The survivability rate only starts going up when it hits the fetal period (after 12 weeks) and is about 21 weeks (5mths) old since fertilization. Even at six months (the earliest medically accepted to take a child out of the womb) the chances of surviving life outside the mother are still slim. In a lot of places, 23 weeks is the cutoff point for an abortion and based on the “chance of life” principle that’s pretty fair to the “child to be” if you ask me.
Despite abortion laws being fair to the potential human and the fact that we’ve (kind of) ruled out that it isn’t really a sin, there are going to be some persons crying “It’s just wrong!” and giving a host of reasons against it and possible alternatives. I’ll tackle a couple of them…
“Give it up for adoption”
PHUQ OUTTA HERE!!! The world’s orphanages have their cups filled and running over with a “wealth” of unwanted kids and you just want to willingly add to that population? You’re only taking away from the chances a child ALREADY BORN has at finding and having a loving family. How much more selfish can you get than that? Sure it’s easy for you to say “Give it up for adoption” but less than half of these kids ever actually get adopted and live the fairytale like life with a happy ending that you’ve lived with a caring family and stable household.
When you cried as a kid you heard, “Aww baby what’s wrong?”, when they cry they hear, “JESUS CHRIST!!! What the fuck are you going on about now you little shit!?” When they hit 16-18 and get kicked out of the orphanage since two “should have been” aborted fetuses took the families they (the initial orphans) should have gotten, where will you be? Probably on the internet or at a rally somewhere outside an abortion clinic passing smug remarks to the persons trying to deal with the bigger issue we’re facing. If you really wanted to do something, why don’t you go adopt a kid? Maybe when the rate of adoption goes up you can start suggesting it as an option. Until then, just STFU and stop trying to raise our taxes! People ALWAYS run their mouths about adopting but how many of them actually do? -REAL
“If you do the crime (unprotected sex), then you do the time (raise the kid)”
Except in the case of rape (unless you knowingly walked down a dark alley where rapists roam), “accidents” happen. I’ve never had sex without a condom before and even I know that, so I know a lot of the more reckless persons out there (guys who go “bare back” and chicks who swear by birth control, spermicide, etc.) know this too. Sure a lot of measures exist to prevent some accidents from happening but the fact remains that they do happen and the right choice is to effectively deal with them.
Conceiving a child can happen accidentally. Condoms break, birth control fails, chicks lie, spermicide gives up on the job; all of this can lead to an accidental pregnancy. Based on these factors, the day after pill was born. Sometimes, you don’t pick up on the results of your actions until after “3-5 days”, and that’s where an abortion comes in.
An abortion promotes family planning, and family planning leads to a better society. When you take away the option of an abortion you force a couple into a position they don’t want to be in or are able to cope with at the time. The added stress of this puts a strain on the relationship and may result in the child being born into a single parent household or a household where the parents have some form of resentment for it.
A resented child is more often than not uncared for, unloved, brutalized, or even abandoned. This type of treatment then forms the core of who this individual is as a person and how they relate to others on a day to day basis. It now leaves them at a severe disadvantage. What I’m saying is that this kid grows up to be a “fuckup”. If you haven’t clued in yet, fuckups are the majority of the people killing, robbing, raping, selling drugs, terrorizing, littering, etc. in the world we live in today. If their parents had just utilized “the back entrance of the neighborhood clinic” then we wouldn’t have to be looking over our shoulders at the ATM or spend a half hour in a drive-thru because of “the jerkwad two cars ahead”.
A guy’s point of view
OK, time to involve the guys again (or at least me). The average cost of raising a child from birth to 17yrs is US$500,000 or US$2451 per month (inclusive of post secondary education) and the average abortion costs between US$350-640. Unless you’re “ballin’ out like that”, US$2451 per month can set you back a lot and push you below the line of economic survival EASY. Between the average cost of living each month and trying to save for college, I don’t have that kind of money laying around to “toss away”, and neither do a lot of guys my age.
If a chick came to me right now and said she peed on a “stick” and got a blue plus sign, after laughing for a few minutes before realizing she’s serious, I’d tell her we’d have to kill it. Despite all the hype, the decision to abort the child is neither solely my choice nor hers since it is one that forces us to function as a family unit; together. Hopefully she’ll agree to this without too much stress but if she doesn’t I’ll try everything possible to convince her to get rid of it (even lying).
Yes I know I’m evil and going to hell but I mean it’s the more ethical option. It’s more ethical to not bring a child into the world that you can provide for comfortably, than to bring one into the world because you’re trying to “save face”. Parenthood is something that you need to be prepared for and not forced into. I’ll go on record here and say that a lot of single mothers out there should have had abortions because they knew that: 1) the guys they got pregnant for were d!(ks, 2) they (the mother) couldn’t play the role of a mother properly or, 3) they (both parents) didn’t have the means to provide for their child. Like I suggested before, homes that don’t cater to and provide for the physical and psychological needs for a child produce “fuckups” at an alarming rate.
You think if that same child becomes an adult and God gave them the choice to go back and choose between having to grow up to be a fuckup or be an outstanding contributing member of society they’d pick option A? I highly doubt this, and a lot of these people who are prolife in a sense are asking parents to choose option A for their kids. Then in the same breath call persons who decide to be prochoice an unethical sinner. Anyone spotting the hypocrisy yet?
Childbirth and parenthood should not be used as a punishment for sexual deeds. Instead of frowning upon and pushing away the mothers who abort babies, we should be appreciating them for who they really are: super heroes. Not only are they combating global warming, overcrowded classrooms, crime, and unemployment, but they are also helping to save the world one stem cell at a time. I’d like to see your friendly neighborhood Spider Man do that.